Updated: Jun 19
You're on a first date with a cute guy who identifies as Christian/conservative. You're enjoying yourself so far, but you can't help but wonder: is this guy a Red Pill Alpha Male?
The first step to us Christian/conservative women avoiding dating these guys is understanding who they are and how they got to be so narcissistic and arrogant; because they didn’t start out that way.
As many of us know, the evolution of the “Red Pill Alpha Male'' (RPAM) has become an epidemic within conservative media. Initially, well-meaning conservative men notice unfamiliar faces talking about real issues; the recent cultural emasculation of men, transgenderism, the increased need for purpose and self-respect. Naturally, the young conservative man is interested and slowly, these people start to take over their viewing. The self conscious, insecure, purposeless guy is lured in by promises of power, money, and women as long as he follows them and their advice to a tee. Eventually, this guy is bombarded with reels of Andrew Tate disrespecting women in vulgar, profane ways, Steven Crowder going on racist rants and making fun of people with downsyndrome, Matt Walsh explicitly promoting fascism and dictatorship, and suddenly, he has turned into a completely different person through the process of brainwashing.
Not only do we want good, conservative men, but more than anything, we want good, Christian men. Here’s how to make sure your date you isn’t a RPAM.
In the initial stages of your relationship,
1) Ask who his role models are.
a) 🚩the RPAM probably doesn’t have any good, substantive role models
b) 🚩the RPAM doesn’t ask “what about you”
c) 🚩the RPAM doesn’t give thoughtful, insightful reasoning
2) Is he courteous? If you haven’t gone on a date with him, how does he communicate?
a) 🚩the RPAM rarely texts you/slowly responds
b) 🚩the RPAM doesn’t hold the door for you, pay for you, pick you up, arrive on
c) 🚩the RPAM doesn’t treat the server or employee well (especially if it’s a
3) How is his social media presence? Who does he follow? What does he like? Yes, stalk
a) 🚩the RPAM follows some (if not all) of the men listed above
i) 🚩🚩🚩the RPAM has recently liked their content (take note of what
exactly he likes)
b) 🚩the RPAM doesn’t follow you (if he does, does he like your content?)
c) 🚩the RPAM follow porn/lude profiles
i) 🚩🚩🚩the RPAM has recently liked some of their content
After getting more serious, you’ll want to get to know his relationships and feelings towards
those around him.
1) Take note of how he treats and speaks about the women in his life
a) 🚩the RPAM yells at his mother
b) 🚩the RPAM rarely makes an effort to talk to his sister/grandmother
c) 🚩the RPAM disrespects his female teachers and classmates
2) Take note of the adult male figures in his life (and how he feels about them)
a) As Mallory has said, RPAMs are “fatherless men fathering other fatherless men.”
b) 🚩 his dad has been married multiple times (and he doesn’t see a problem with it)
c) 🚩his father/grandfather is addicted to something or depressed (not that he’s
responsible for this, but does he realize addiction/depression can be genetic?)
d) 🚩 he makes distasteful jokes with his guy friends
Lastly, a red flag doesn’t mean he needs to be cut off! It might just mean he’s rusty at being romantic, isn’t sure of the norms, and needs your help. However, if several of these red flags are being waved (and possibly some of your own red flags), that might be your cue. More than anything, trust your God-given instincts. For example, if he’s liked some of Tate’s recent content, it’s possible he doesn’t know quite yet how detrimental his philosophies are. Maybe he’s just naive.
I remember dating someone in high school and after a few months, I literally heard God tell me he wasn’t the one. With that, I broke up with him and I’m glad I did, because less than 1 month later, Andy Voyles came into my peripheral and soon, he stole my heart.
While the pool of guys who match this criteria is limited, you can 100% find the perfect man.
It will come when you least expect it. Be prayerful, be patient. The Lord will direct you!